Excessive screen time disrupts family balance. From lack of attention, disturbed sleep, and tensions at home, warning signs are multiplying. Taking control starts with the example set by parents.
Smartphones, video games – screens have become a product we consume daily. Parents can lose control over their children or teens. Here’s how to prevent this danger and what to do if it happens anyway.
“The price we pay is the exhaustion of our attentional capacities,” explains Sabine Duflo, clinical psychologist and family therapist, screen specialist, founder of the “screen overexposure” collective (CoSE). When screens take up too much space in a child’s life, many parents have the same feeling: “We’ve lost our child.” To avoid reaching this point, parents must first look at themselves in the mirror.
The crucial role of parents
Indeed, “90% of education is done through imitation,” reminds the psychologist. “A child only accepts a rule if the adult is able to apply it to themselves.” The question is simple, are parents really available when the child is around? Everything a child needs to build – language, self-confidence, sociability – develops in the relationship and family exchanges. “If the adult is often interrupted by their phone, these moments of exchange do not happen or happen poorly.”
Signs that should alert
Similar to an addiction, certain behaviors gradually appear:
– the child loses interest in other activities (sports, family, school); – shared moments lose their appeal; – they become more nervous or aggressive; – they have trouble concentrating; – sleep deteriorates.
“Simple requests like coming to eat or going to shower suddenly become very difficult to accept,” describes Sabine Duflo. “And it can happen very quickly.”
Contents designed to hook
If screens are so difficult to regulate, it’s also because many contents are designed to capture attention. Free online video games, social networks, or very short videos rely on random reward systems, similar to slot machines. “These mechanisms send very powerful dopamine flows to the brain,” she explains.
Taking back control at home
To prevent screens from taking over, the psychologist recommends simple rules applied by the whole family:
– no screen time in the morning; – no screens during meals; – no screens in the bedroom; – all screens off 30 minutes before bedtime.
Another piece of advice: prioritize contents with a beginning and an end (movies, paid games) rather than platforms or free games that operate limitlessly and are filled with random rewards.
A tough battle for parents
When screen use is already deeply ingrained, especially in adolescence, the situation can be challenging. “Parents are neither idiots nor incompetent. They are simply trying to fight against the behavioral addictions caused by these free apps,” emphasizes Sabine Duflo. Because behind the screens are also economic models based on capturing attention. And sometimes, taking back control starts with a simple gesture: recreating screen-free moments for the whole family.
To learn more, visit the link to Sabine Duflo’s Adolescents & Screens Addiction consultation.
